How to Talk About Money Before Saying ‘I Do’


Image courtesy of Podknox

While everyone knows that there are many details to iron out before saying your vows, what many people fail to recognize is the critical importance of discussing money matters before walking down the aisle.

The fact that money comes between many married couples and is one of the leading causes of divorce today should be a red flag to engaged couples. Talking seriously with your betrothed about all financial issues that may arise within a marriage may be one of the best decisions you can make to ensure your future happiness.

Be sure to approach the discussion with an open attitude and demeanor, and don’t hold anything back. Let your betrothed know now about any and all debts that you may have incurred before you two met each other. Also, be sure to fully divulge how much money you actually make, and find out your fiance’s income as well. It is best to know what you’re stepping into before tying the knot. Of course, money isn’t everything, but it is a significant portion of everything. 😉

Talk about how you both feel about: saving for retirement, putting any of your future children through college, and your general attitude toward money. Don’t forget to discuss things like: gift-giving, saving, splurging, using coupons, etc.

Many adults simply haven’t been taught how to properly express themselves when it comes to financial matters. In fact, up to 70% of adults admit to having negative feelings when it comes to talking about money with a significant other. That is a scary number! Imagine how much worse the situation could be if left until after the vows have been taken and it’s “too late” to have that conversation.

You and your significant other certainly do not have to agree 100% on all matters relating to money and finances. The important thing to do is to find your way to an agreement or a compromise of sorts. It is important to take note of any differences in opinion that you both may have regarding money now. You can set money rules so that arguments don’t ensue later, causing dangerous friction within your newly formed family.

Remember that couples don’t always necessarily come from the same financial background, so it is important to find a balance that you both agree with and feel good about before the big day arrives. Set the tone for your future money discussions by remaining calm, respectful, honest and loving. Also, keep in mind that it will continue to be important for you to discuss money on a regular basis even after you walk down the aisle. Doing so will eliminate a lot of tension and conflict in that area, and your relationship will have the potential to be that much happier and more secure. Furthermore, it may very well prevent your relationship from becoming a divorce statistic.

3 Responses to How to Talk About Money Before Saying ‘I Do’

  1. Pingback: Divorce and Your Mortgage: The Dirty Little Secret | Veitengruber Law

  2. Pingback: Will My Foreclosure Hurt My Spouse’s Credit After We Marry? | Veitengruber Law

  3. Pingback: Planning to File for Bankruptcy: Can I Still Take a (Pre-Paid) Vacation? | Veitengruber Law

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